Posts Tagged with "Fear"

an update…

I’ve seriously neglected this blog (and its followers), and for that I sincerely apologize. Lately, I’ve considered archiving this particular blog/URL and migrating over to Tumblr to continue documenting transition/trans* related stuff… (eh, to be determined). At any rate, there’s a LOT of updating I’ve wanted to do over the last several months, but to […]

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“All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.” ~Anatole France I haven’t blogged in an entire lifetime. No, seriously… SO much has happened, and it’s pretty daunting to even consider catching […]

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Personal: Coming Out Woes and WHOAs!

I’m SO sorry that (once again) I kinda fell off the planet… it’s definitely been a stressful few weeks, and I just haven’t found the focus/energy to write — even though I really have wanted to. I guess I’m also a little frustrated with myself for not making more progress on the coming out front. […]

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Personal: Growing Up Girl

When i was little I loved to climb trees and play in the dirt and ride my bike. My BLUE boy’s BMX bike. As I got a little older and my friends started having crushes on the boys in our class, I realized that MY crushes weren’t on those stupid boys that I played with in […]

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T Update: Three Weeks (already!)

I’ve been trying to post for the last week and a half – in fact, I think this post makes a grand total of FIVE attempts. Yeeeeeah, I’ve started and subsequently BAILED on five different topics (don’t worry, they’re saved as Drafts, so maybe they’ll get finished… Eventually.). I really want to write SOMETHING to […]

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Personal: Letters

I’m sorry I’ve been M.I.A. lately. I’ve had a busy week — erg, well, mentally busy anyway. I had my second appointment with Therapist 2.0 on Tuesday and now, as luck would have it, I ALSO have an appointment with a trans-friendly gynecologist (ugh, ugh, UGH!) this afternoon — BUT the good news is that […]

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Personal: Progress (part 2)

Despite my fears and the many hurdles I still have yet to face, my therapist told me that I am ready (YEEEE!!! ::puke::) I was shocked and surprised and excited and scared, and I simultaneously experienced waves of thrill AND nausea. I was expecting to be months away from anything… I was expecting that she […]

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Personal: Progress (part 1)

My poor ADD brain is so overloaded right now; I’m not really sure where to start… (Hmm… Perhaaaps I should start with an appointment to get back on some sorta meds for that damn ADD. Heh.) At any rate, I had my first appointment with my new** therapist yesterday Tuesday afternoon, and I’m still reeling […]

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Personal: “Hey Girl!”

Growing up I knew that I was different from the other kids – even before I knew that words like homosexual, butch, queer or transgender existed. I just knew that I didn’t quite… fit. Now that I’m 34 and not building roads with the boys in the sandbox or trying to impress the girls with how […]

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You Tell Me: Gym + Binders = Suck

I really, really, really, REALLY need to get my ass back in the gym… and for the most part – I’m READY. Like, really, really READY. But when the time comes, and I think about what it’s like to workout in a binder – I inevitably find an excuse not to go. I get hung up […]

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