thebutchelor

Personal: Letters

I’m sorry I’ve been M.I.A. lately. I’ve had a busy week — erg, well, mentally busy anyway. I had my second appointment with Therapist 2.0 on Tuesday and now, as luck would have it, I ALSO have an appointment with a trans-friendly gynecologist (ugh, ugh, UGH!) this afternoon — BUT the good news is that [...]

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Personal: Progress (part 2)

Despite my fears and the many hurdles I still have yet to face, my therapist told me that I am ready (YEEEE!!! ::puke::) I was shocked and surprised and excited and scared, and I simultaneously experienced waves of thrill AND nausea. I was expecting to be months away from anything… I was expecting that she [...]

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List: To Do…di-do-di-doo

Okay, so like I mentioned in my last post, I have about a braziiiillion thoughts whirling around in my head at the moment + a brain riddled with ADD = a lag in progress and a LOT of whirling and planning and thinking and list-makin’ and then maybe a little more planning… and then—D’oh! I [...]

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Personal: Progress (part 1)

My poor ADD brain is so overloaded right now; I’m not really sure where to start… (Hmm… Perhaaaps I should start with an appointment to get back on some sorta meds for that damn ADD. Heh.) At any rate, I had my first appointment with my new** therapist yesterday Tuesday afternoon, and I’m still reeling [...]

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Personal: I wish…

Sometimes I wish I’d just been born male… or female – or “straight”… non-queer… WHATEVER. As long as it was at least, like, 90% “something” and without question. Of course, then I remind myself that SURELY there’s a reason that *this* is my journey. That this fucked-up mess of gender and sexuality is all part of [...]

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Personal: “Letting Go of ‘Butch’”

You know, I really want to document/vent/discuss my experience from the other night, but I’m still struggling with the writing process for whatever reason… It’s like all of my thoughts are stuck inside my head, and I either end up rambling or can’t quite figure out what I want to say or how I feel… [...]

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Personal: Fear and doubt

A few weeks ago, I met a handful of guys from a local FTM group to see a movie, and it was the first time ever that I was referred to using male pronouns. It was weird and exciting and… really kind of AMAZING. They also called me by my chosen male name, and for [...]

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